It’s been a while. But I have the best excuse. I am 20 weeks pregnant! With a boy!
When I imagined becoming pregnant again I thought I’d want to share with the world quickly. I’ve thought a lot about the grin and bare it silence that can mark the first trimester as well as the deafening silence that comes for so many after a miscarriage, and in my fantasy of my second pregnancy I would break that silence. I would share the joy that I was pregnant, share how awful I felt most waking moments for the first three months, and then if there were a loss, I would share that, too. Because I like sharing. I write a blog where all I do is share.
But then I got pregnant much faster than I’d expected (the only good thing to come out of Trump’s inauguration is this baby… because when it feels like the world might be ending, there is only one thing to do). And to be honest, it took me a few weeks to wrap my mind around it (the pregnancy, that is. I have by no means wrapped my mind around our president). Being pregnant with a second baby has not been as blissful as it was the first go-around. And the first trimester was hard. I retreated into a very private and quiet space to cope. A space called sleep and carbohydrates.
But as the school year wraps up (holy smokes- more on that another day), I am hopeful I will have more space for sharing about this wild transition here with you all.
For now, I’ll leave you with my favorite anecdote of the day. After telling Luke that he was going to be a big brother, we spoke a little about how the baby is growing inside mommy’s uterus. He pulled up his shirt, looked at his belly and goes “nope, no babies here.” Then he ran off across the front yard yelling, “I’m a uterus! I’m a uterus!”
So he’s totally clear on what’s happening. No confusion whatsoever.